Top 5: People to Feel Sorry For So Far in 2008-09

5. It is hard to feel sorry for any Calgary Flames player or fan. Ever. That being said, you gotta sympathize with Brandon Prust just a little bit for being on the wrong end of this Rick Rypien beating:



4. J.P. Barry is no longer just Mats Sundin's agent, he is also the unintended manager of the Waffle House that is Sundin's indecision on his hockey future. Barry has been forced to defend his client's inaction on multiple occasions since July, and you get the feeling that he knows little more than the rest of us about what is going on inside Mats' glorious, bald head. However, no one will be feeling sorry for him if Sundin accepts that $20 million, 2 year offer from the Canucks. 4% of $20 million is what, $800,000? That's a pretty decent slice of pie to go along with the waffle Barry has been forced to digest since the summer.

3. Did Darren McCarty really need to be reminded of his struggles with alcoholism by George W. Bush? I mean sure it was meant in a complimentary way, but imagine getting called out on that kind of sensitive issue by the US President, at a celebration of your Stanley Cup championship no less. Oh yeah, and a month later the Red Wings put him on waivers and sent him to the minors. When he got recalled he hurt his groin. Not a great start to the season.

2. Mike van Ryn. No, not for getting traded from Florida to one of the only teams that could conceivably be worse than the Panthers this season - rather for being on the receiving end of Milan Lucic's best Trevor Linden impression:



1. Sarah Palin's as-yet-unborn sixth child.

Canucks cap 'Leafs bashing week' by bashing the Leafs

It's been a fun week here at 'Nucks and Pucks, with some good banter in the comments section (I consider 1+ comment to be a popular post - look, it's a small-time blog, 'kay?) and some irate Facebook messages from friends. Tonight was, of course, the Main Event as the Canucks and Maple Leafs faced off at GM Place in front of a sellout crowd and a national TV audience on Hockey Night in Canada. The result speaks for itself:



Clearly the Canucks wiped the floor with the Leafs. After weathering an early storm, including the spectacular sequence in which Captain Luongo barred the door on a Leafs' 2-man advantage without a stick, the Canucks struck back. Kyle "Steve Sullivan" Wellwood struck back against the team that waived him by netting the first goal. From there the floodgates opened, and by the midway point of the second period the game was already 4-0. The Canucks went on auto-pilot the rest of the way, unfortunately surrendering two goals in the game's final 6:07 and allowing the Leafs to escape the West Coast with a modicum of respect.

Despite leaving the game with a pathetic .556 save percentage on the night, Vesa Toskala was not as bad as the stats suggest. Not that that it was exactly possible for him to be worse than that SVP suggests. But if you watch each Canucks goal, you'll see that he is truly culpable on only one of them. On the other three he was the victim of the Maple Leafs weak attempts at defense:

Goal #1: Wellwood was allowed to walk to the net thanks to some shoddy defensive coverage by Matt Stajan. He then tipped the puck top shelf, a tough one to stop.

Goal #2: Blame Toskala for this one. A brutal rebound was left on the doorstep for an opportunistic Ryan Kesler to fire home. Though it would've helped the Leafs', and Toskala's, cause if someone had taken the man in front.

Goal #3: Tomas Kaberle, I thought better of you. I know it was Willie "One Goal a Season" Mitchell, but seriously, you can't just mosey back into your zone like that.

Goal #4: Daniel Sedin scored this goal standing about 10 feet from the Leafs' net in the middle of a square of four Leafs "defenders." Just brutal defensive coverage.

Oh yeah, and Luke Schenn got filled by Rob Davidson. Actually, I think this fight is symbolic of the game: an early stumble by Vancouver was easily corrected by a number of devastating blows to the Leafs, whose late effort to take down the 'Nucks couldn't mask the fact that they got pummeled by a superior opponent. Enjoy!

Maple Leafs metaphorically crushed by Canucks fan!

"Leafs bashing week" continues here at 'Nucks and Pucks with a story of one fan's need to physically manifest his hatred of the Blue & White by crushing a car that is painted, well, blue and white.

The photo above is a scan of Monday's copy of that well-respected journalistic rag, 24 Hours. Widely considered to be the "New York Times of Vancouver," 24 Hours brings its insightful brand of reportage to Vancouver commuters each weekday. Seems it's also jumped aboard the anti-Leaf train with an interesting little contest.

Yes, 24 Hours ran an eBay auction offering one 'lucky' fan the anti-Leafs experience of a lifetime: pushing a button to crush a beater car that is painted up in Leafs colours. The winning bidder paid $212.50 (!) for the privilege of pressing that button, and it all went down last Saturday. If you want to learn more, check out the auction page or the 24 Hours gallery, which has 19 pictures of the mechanical carnage. Or even better, watch the video (slight profanity warning):



Wow. Not quite Citizen Kane, is it? There are a number of things that don't quite work about this video:

1. Who pulls into a scrap yard to use the facilities? What's wrong with Tim Hortons or a gas station?

2. Who pulls over to use a porta-potty? Seriously. The dude's suposed to be in suburban Vancouver, not at Lollapalooza.

3. Why would there happen to be a crowd of Canucks fans hanging out in said scrap yard, when they clearly have no business being there?

4. Wouldn't there be serious legal ramifications for the guys who crushed the car? If I was that Leafs fan the second call I was making after 9-1-1 would be to my lawyer.

5. And finally, what's the deal with what appears to be a set of giant inflatable testicles with a Leafs logo on them, which appear at around the 1:28 mark? If they were onscreen for any less time I think it would qualify as subliminal messaging.

Turns out the guy's a Sens fan too. I think that explains it, because as much as I'm all for anti-Leafs banter this is a tad too ridiculous for me. Anyway, if he wanted to make an anti-Leafs statement doesn't he realize that for $212.50 he could have bought, like, six Eric Lindros Leafs jerseys and burned them? Although come to think of it, wearing a Lindros Toronto jersey might be the ultimate mockery of the Maple Leafs...

On a positive note, the $212.50 will go to Canucks Place which is a very worthy charity.

Sportsnet overrules NHL, Canucks to play Predators instead of Avalanche

This is a screen capture from sportsnet.ca at around 11:40AM today. Apparently the Canucks are no longer playing the Colorado Avalanche. I always had a hunch that Sportsnet pulled the strings behind the scenes at the NHL.

I think my favourite part is that the Predators are considered "a long time nemesis." No word yet on how the Predators feel about flying from San Jose up to Vancouver, before heading back to California to play Anaheim on Friday.

Maple Laughs

Get your snare drum and cymbal ready, because it's time for the "Top 5 Toronto Maple Leafs Jokes!"

Number 5

Q: How are the Maple Leafs and the Titanic similar?
A: They both look good 'til they hit the ice.

Number 4

Q: What does Toronto have that Montreal doesn't?
A: Black and white photographs of their last Stanley Cup.

Number 3

Q: Where's the red light district in Toronto?
A: Behind the Maple Leafs net.

Number 2



AAAAAAAAND... Number 1

Q: Why can’t Hamilton get an NHL franchise?
A: Because then Toronto will want one!

Thank you folks, you've been a great audience! Remember to try the house special and always tip your waitress. Good night!

Welcome to Leafs bashing week

This Saturday the Toronto Maple Leafs pay a visit to Vancouver for a hotly-contested game with the Canucks. This match-up always creates particular excitement, as there are many transplanted Torontonians in BC and Vancouverites in Ontario (of which I was one for seven years). Western Canadians tend to be particularly antagonistic towards the Leafs, and while I tacitly support the Leafs (in the same way I generally support all Canadian teams that aren't in the Northwest Division) I can't help but join in the fun.

This week, in the build-up to the Canucks/Leafs game on Saturday, 'Nucks and Pucks will feature a number of posts dedicated to Leafs bashing, hating and taunting. If I was still living in Toronto this week would be a great back-and-forth banter session with my friends who are Leafs supporters. In lieu of this annual tradition, I hope that this blog can recapture a little bit of that spirit.

I start with a highlight package from the last time the Canucks and Leafs met. I had the pleasure of attending that game, which took place at the Air Canada Centre in January 2007. There were probably 2000-3000 Canucks fans in the building, creating what was at the time the largest hockey crowd ever at the ACC. You can read a recap of the game here. Or you can watch this video for a visual reminder of the smackdown that the Canucks laid on Toronto. Oh yeah, Andrew Raycroft was in goal. Need I say more?